// video; open

[circumspector]

[ Angel's feature's flicker onto the screen, black-eyed, black hair, those strange blue markings that adorn her body down her left side and right horn, that telltale hint of fur that appears across her shoulders, her neck, collar-like. Decidedly, completely, not human. ]

Hi. There has never been an easy way to have this conversation so I am just going to jump into it. I'm a monster. [ Her long ears flick, pricking to sound, her chin resting in the palm of her hand. Her thick, black claws that come to flat ends tap against her cheek. ] It's a long, long story. But the sum of it is pretty straight forward, there was a God. She took people like this place takes people, she turned us into things. I became this. I wasn't always this, nor was I chosen for any grand reason. But now I am capable of smashing through concrete with one kick, I can lift ten or twelves my own weight, and I weight a lot, despite my size.

But that and the horns isn't why I call myself a monster. I'm a monster because I crave human flesh. I can and have eaten living people. I didn't get a choice about it. I can sate it when things are good. Raw meat of animals will do the trick. But, if I put it off any meat at all long enough, the hunger becomes ravenous, and I get taken over by this... this rage and hunger. I might - care for you, want happy things for you. But when I am like that? I'm not your friend. I'm not human. I'm not... not me. I can manage it, but this place just wiped my memories for a few days, so I can't make that assurance it will never happen.

So this is my permission. The day that happens, and you can't trap me or stop me, you can put a bullet in my head. I won't cling selfishly to a life where I am hurting someone to fuel myself. I'll only regret it when I come out of it. If it's me or someone else, I'll always pick for someone else to live over me hurting someone just because I am like... this.

[ She clears her throat, because what else is there to really say? So just... ]

... Do you think Tequila is bad for the Reindire? I keep feeding them mine.

[ #nailedit ]

Comments

@lazarus | video | private

[benhargreeves]

[ Ben grapples with wanting to reply by text, since he has an easier time discussing extremely serious topics that way, but it occurs to him that this person might not be able to read. Sure, the devices can convert text to speech, but that might muddle the tone, and honestly, he should just suck it up and use video. His expression is grave: ]

If it comes down to it and someone has to stop you to save lives, I will do my best to do so without hurting you. And... if I can't, then I'll kill you. You have my word. I'm... kind of a monster, too. In a different way. So I should be able to do it.

[ He doesn't want to kill anyone. Especially not someone who, from the sound of it, has been a guinea pig, who has been forced to hurt people without being given a choice. Ben knows what that's like, even if the particulars don't line up. But that is why he wants this stranger to know that she has safeguards in place. If the situation were reversed, if Ben were the one who might go berserk and hurt people, he would want the reassurance of one or two people promising they would kill him instead.

Then, in a slightly lighter voice, because he knows well that humor can really help the horribleness go down, he adds: ]

Tequila is definitely bad for just about every living animal, I'm pretty sure. Not sure if it's worse than it would be for a human, though.

[circumspector]

[ The feed crackles between them. Her black eyes blinking, the brief backlight shines when the screen light flickers her eyes golden-bright. An animal in the dark, no matter how she could talk otherwise.

Though, really, there is only one thing that matters. ]

Thank you.

[ Her ears flick, ears tilting back and then forward again. ]

Hrm. Alright. I'll try and feed them some more water. They seem to really like the tequila though.

[benhargreeves]

You're welcome.

[ It feels weird saying that when the thing he'd done to earn her thanks was offer to kill her. Ben hesitates, between his discomfort and desire to end the conversation, and needing to take many more precautions than just this. In the end, the latter wins. ]

I totally get posting this message and getting your worst case scenario plans in order, but an ounce of prevention is a pound of cure and all that. I wasn't lying, when I said I'm probably capable of killing you. I was born with powers that mean it's easy for me to kill people. Like, physically. But it's -

[ He breaks off, swallowing, taking a moment to compose himself. From what she'd said, Angel will probably understand well enough why he's having some difficulty getting the words out, why his voice is rough with emotion that he's carefully holding in check. ]

But it isn't easy. I... have hurt a lot of people, and didn't get a choice about it, and I'd really really like to not have to again. So what can I do to prepare so we never get to the worst case scenario and you don't have to die and I don't have to kill and we're both happier? Are there tranquilizers that will work on you? Could we build some kind of a cage or - restraints, I don't know? Come up for a codeword when you feel your control slipping? A schedule for - how often you need to eat?

[audio | @hot.damn]

[circumitus]

If it's any consolation, you're not the only monster here.

[Rey might look human, but what she's capable of and what she has done has earned her much ire and resentment in her world. She can do those things now just as easily as she did then, with the exception of having some sense of moral clarity at this point.

[Either way, there's no judgement. She's met Angel before so that she doesn't balk at her monsterous form, but Rey's also seen Elleru in a different body as well. Not that she's really addressed that yet, since asking someone if they're a talking bird-beast isn't a great conversation starter.]

Don't suppose there might be a way to synthesize human meat to satiate your cravings? Have no problems with killing, but would rather that be a last resort.

[circumspector]

It's not about the meat, unfortunately, it's about the hunt and the kill.

[circumitus]

Ah, so you don't need human meat to survive -- you just need to hunt one? [Like a cat.]

Killing you won't be a problem, but would rather that be a last resort. Do the cravings ever die down if you're isolated or is killing something always required?

video: un: cabernet

[redwinekindofgirl]

[Well if this isn't familiar in far too many uncomfortable ways. Julie listens, takes everything in, and when she answers she's part sympathetic but entirely determined.]

If all it would take is a bullet, I can do it.

[She has an assault rifle stowed away, one that she hasn't used since she arrived here with it, but... all the better to keep it in reserve, it seems.]

Sounds like you should just eat non-human meat as often as you can. [A beat.] And tequila probably isn't good for the reindire.

[circumspector]

A bullet will do it. Facing me head on isn't a good idea. Sniping is better.

I do, don't worry. But it's not the first time I've had something... Drive me beyond my own humanity even with all my being careful. That being said my appetite is... Massive.

And sometimes it isn't about the... Food itself. It's about the hunt. About chasing and taking. About ripping it all to pieces myself.

[redwinekindofgirl]

Comforting.

[Not.

Good information to have, though. Information she could have done without knowing, but when someone is telling you that they could turn on you if they get too hungry, more is better.]

Any weak spots?

video; @Spides

[itsnotaonesie]

I get that that was all super important and I definitely listened to all of it and I promise I'll do something about it if you try to eat us, but. First I wanna challenge you to an arm wrestling competition because I've never met anyone before whose strength was as ridiculous as mine. and this is kind of amazing.

[ #priorities ]

[circumspector]

Are you sure? I once ripped a tree out of the ground.

With one hand.

[itsnotaonesie]

That is awesome.

I am even more sure now than I was before, yes.

@Pratt | Text | Private

[theweakhavepurpose]

Sure. I'll kill you if it comes to it, if you promise to do the same if I start killing people.

Deal?

[circumspector]

Agreed. Is there any warning signs I should look out for?

[theweakhavepurpose]

I'm not 100% sure what I do before things get really bad. I don't remember anything when I wake up.

[Video]

[mustact]

[ Uhm ... Should he be concerned? ]

What precisely is Tequila?

[Video]

[circumspector]

It's an alcohol? Truxican.

[Video]

[mustact]

Truxican tells me little.

[ But it doesn't matter, so he shakes his head. ]

There are probably better things to feed them. Have you not seen them look for food on their own?

Text

[nothinglikefather]

Love you really are going to have to stop telling people this stuff.

And I don't think anyone is meant to drink tequila.

voice

[circumspector]

I need to Jacob, I don't want anyone to get hurt because of me.

Are you sure? The robots keep bringing it to me. I really like it so far.

[nothinglikefather]

[ A soft, fond sigh. ] Which proves you aren't a monster. You're a very uniquely shaped person, sure, but Angel... its the fact you give a damn that proves you are a good person.

It tastes good, I'll give you that. But that doesn't mean you should feed it to them. Or drink it yourself.

At least, not without my company.

video; @Qubit

[superposition]

[ ... Okay! Cool! That sure is another one to keep a close eye on! Because, you know, he didn't have enough to worry about.

Qubit lets his personal annoyance fade before he replies, though. The parallels with Carlisle's situation are pretty glaring, after all. Once human, now monstrous. The potential to succumb and, in their rage, subject innocent people to unspeakable fates. This woman's new - he doesn't know or trust her like he does Carlisle - but it'd be unfair not to offer her the same fighting chance.

He has his arms folded in the video, his expression determined, but not unsympathetic. ]

... Well. That's quite the warning label. I appreciate you being forthright about it, miss ...?

[ He is absolutely reading her username as "Four-N-Six-Three-One," for the record, because of course he is. ]

[circumspector]

Angel. I'm Angel.

text; @apocalypseArisen (hi pretend im on time??)

[livingdeadgirl]

ok um
theres a lot to unpack in there but
out of curiosity
if it is specifically human flesh that you crave
would an alien be in the clear theoretically
just wondering

[circumspector]

Alien does just fine. That's... Actually predominately what I have eaten come to think of it. The last place I was had a bad habit of aliens trying to attack us and experiment on us. So I took more than a few bites out of them and I worked just as well as human or animal flesh.