// video; open

[circumspector]

[ Angel's feature's flicker onto the screen, black-eyed, black hair, those strange blue markings that adorn her body down her left side and right horn, that telltale hint of fur that appears across her shoulders, her neck, collar-like. Decidedly, completely, not human. ]

Hi. There has never been an easy way to have this conversation so I am just going to jump into it. I'm a monster. [ Her long ears flick, pricking to sound, her chin resting in the palm of her hand. Her thick, black claws that come to flat ends tap against her cheek. ] It's a long, long story. But the sum of it is pretty straight forward, there was a God. She took people like this place takes people, she turned us into things. I became this. I wasn't always this, nor was I chosen for any grand reason. But now I am capable of smashing through concrete with one kick, I can lift ten or twelves my own weight, and I weight a lot, despite my size.

But that and the horns isn't why I call myself a monster. I'm a monster because I crave human flesh. I can and have eaten living people. I didn't get a choice about it. I can sate it when things are good. Raw meat of animals will do the trick. But, if I put it off any meat at all long enough, the hunger becomes ravenous, and I get taken over by this... this rage and hunger. I might - care for you, want happy things for you. But when I am like that? I'm not your friend. I'm not human. I'm not... not me. I can manage it, but this place just wiped my memories for a few days, so I can't make that assurance it will never happen.

So this is my permission. The day that happens, and you can't trap me or stop me, you can put a bullet in my head. I won't cling selfishly to a life where I am hurting someone to fuel myself. I'll only regret it when I come out of it. If it's me or someone else, I'll always pick for someone else to live over me hurting someone just because I am like... this.

[ She clears her throat, because what else is there to really say? So just... ]

... Do you think Tequila is bad for the Reindire? I keep feeding them mine.

[ #nailedit ]

Comments

[superposition]

[ She's hesitant. Well, that's understandable, even without knowing her history. It probably doesn't help that he's offering this as a complete stranger! But that goes both ways - since she's a stranger to him, there's not as much nuance for him to factor into the solution. It becomes a purely technical challenge, and those, he enjoys. ]

Hmm... [ He taps his chin, thinking. ] Well, since you have super-strength, ideally we'd want to work around that instead of against it. Your best chance is going to be something that works from the inside out, something to weaken or incapacitate you long enough to get you some proper food. It might even be as simple as an appetite suppressant.

Naturally we'd need to experiment a bit to determine what's most effective, but...

[circumspector]

[He isn't to know, he isn't to comprehend in that moment what runs through her at the idea of experiments. A life time of being locked away and cut apart, lonely and being destroyed from the inside out.

But what is apparent is the tone that grows in her voice, far deeper, far stronger, half growl. Comes out hot and fast and not meant to be so furious but her rage is a terrible, terrible thing, these days. It pours into the words, at odds with her little frame and otherwise helpful everything she tries to be. ] No. I won't be experimented on again.

[ And she hastily clears her throat, trying to clear it down. Turning her face away briefly, ] we can discuss it first and then find ways with that. But I'll need to do it the right way, it's a... sensitive subject for me. But I think we can rule out immune suppression. It's a hunger we were cursed with that was triggered by a rolling fog. Where ever it comes from, it isn't just about appetite. I quite literally waste away without raw, fresh killed meat, else I go steadily more insane. Nothing makes it stop but sating it once it reaches that point.

1/2

[superposition]

[ Qubit's visibly startled by her sudden vehemence - he's had that sort of suggestion shot down before, of course, but it's the uncanny violence in her tone that catches him off guard. He regains his composure quickly, but still backs off. ]

All right. Sorry, I didn't realize.

[ The first rule of ethical research is informed consent, after all. And he's trying not to be a total piece of shit. ]

2/2

[superposition]

[ It sounds like she's still willing to meet him partway, though, at least intellectually. He knows that feeling, when your mind pulls you one way and your emotions the other. Trauma is a powerful thing.

So where were they? Right. Appetite suppressants are a no-go, because the problem isn't strictly physiological. He sighs, briefly rubbing his temple. ]

Figures it'd be a curse, though. Magical in origin, then? Can you tell me anything more about the entity that did this to you?

[circumspector]

[ She lets him settle with it, having given him a middle ground. Taking easing breaths until she becomes calm again. ]

Definitely. That'd be the Fog God. She was a cruel, capricious nasty piece of work, that took people like this place takes people. Then when the Fog came - that's what we called it - we'd transform. We'd all transform, though not all to the same thing, and even if we were both say, Minotaurs, it'd take us completely differently.