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redshiftrp2020-01-07 01:01 pm
circumspector) wrote in redshiftrp2020-01-07 01:01 pm
// video; open
[ Angel's feature's flicker onto the screen, black-eyed, black hair, those strange blue markings that adorn her body down her left side and right horn, that telltale hint of fur that appears across her shoulders, her neck, collar-like. Decidedly, completely, not human. ]
Hi. There has never been an easy way to have this conversation so I am just going to jump into it. I'm a monster. [ Her long ears flick, pricking to sound, her chin resting in the palm of her hand. Her thick, black claws that come to flat ends tap against her cheek. ] It's a long, long story. But the sum of it is pretty straight forward, there was a God. She took people like this place takes people, she turned us into things. I became this. I wasn't always this, nor was I chosen for any grand reason. But now I am capable of smashing through concrete with one kick, I can lift ten or twelves my own weight, and I weight a lot, despite my size.
But that and the horns isn't why I call myself a monster. I'm a monster because I crave human flesh. I can and have eaten living people. I didn't get a choice about it. I can sate it when things are good. Raw meat of animals will do the trick. But, if I put it off any meat at all long enough, the hunger becomes ravenous, and I get taken over by this... this rage and hunger. I might - care for you, want happy things for you. But when I am like that? I'm not your friend. I'm not human. I'm not... not me. I can manage it, but this place just wiped my memories for a few days, so I can't make that assurance it will never happen.
So this is my permission. The day that happens, and you can't trap me or stop me, you can put a bullet in my head. I won't cling selfishly to a life where I am hurting someone to fuel myself. I'll only regret it when I come out of it. If it's me or someone else, I'll always pick for someone else to live over me hurting someone just because I am like... this.
[ She clears her throat, because what else is there to really say? So just... ]
... Do you think Tequila is bad for the Reindire? I keep feeding them mine.
[ #nailedit ]
Hi. There has never been an easy way to have this conversation so I am just going to jump into it. I'm a monster. [ Her long ears flick, pricking to sound, her chin resting in the palm of her hand. Her thick, black claws that come to flat ends tap against her cheek. ] It's a long, long story. But the sum of it is pretty straight forward, there was a God. She took people like this place takes people, she turned us into things. I became this. I wasn't always this, nor was I chosen for any grand reason. But now I am capable of smashing through concrete with one kick, I can lift ten or twelves my own weight, and I weight a lot, despite my size.
But that and the horns isn't why I call myself a monster. I'm a monster because I crave human flesh. I can and have eaten living people. I didn't get a choice about it. I can sate it when things are good. Raw meat of animals will do the trick. But, if I put it off any meat at all long enough, the hunger becomes ravenous, and I get taken over by this... this rage and hunger. I might - care for you, want happy things for you. But when I am like that? I'm not your friend. I'm not human. I'm not... not me. I can manage it, but this place just wiped my memories for a few days, so I can't make that assurance it will never happen.
So this is my permission. The day that happens, and you can't trap me or stop me, you can put a bullet in my head. I won't cling selfishly to a life where I am hurting someone to fuel myself. I'll only regret it when I come out of it. If it's me or someone else, I'll always pick for someone else to live over me hurting someone just because I am like... this.
[ She clears her throat, because what else is there to really say? So just... ]
... Do you think Tequila is bad for the Reindire? I keep feeding them mine.
[ #nailedit ]
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[ Which she is welcome to whenever she wants to. Given the way she's leaning into him, though, he's not in too much of a hurry to pull away. ]
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It was wonderful. she never wanted it to end. ]
Okay. Did you sleep good?
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[ Did you sleep at all? ]
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Yes. When I finally got to sleep...
[ Guilty as charged. ]
... But it was a good sleep when I did.
[ Like always, she had slipped against his side, curled her ear into his chest, she had let his warmth fill her limbs, and she had let her mind turn itself off at last. ]
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What were you doing?
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Testing reports on the half-life of the radiation outside, I think. It's fascinating. I love break-downs on chemical compounds, I haven't seen this sort before at all.
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Tell me about it.
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I think it's the Red Shift everyone mentioned. It... deposits stuff. I mean, us, for one thing. [ Paise. ] You know I find it kind of nice to have an actual event to warn for being dumped between dimensions this time? [ she clears her throat. ] But other stuff. Lots of stuff. Stuff that shows up in dirt. Dirt keeps a history of everything. So does the bacteria in your stomach, but that's something for Tannis to go on about.
[ She braces her hooves flat against the desk, propping her knees up with the way they naturally curve. ] Granted, remember how in the book I mention about radiation being really bad? [ Because unlike Jacob, she knew Connor would have taken the time to read and take steps to learn from it. ] It does that to everything, not just people. Radiation is an explosion that never ends. Forever and ever and ever, it reacts. It changes form, which is the remarkable part. Usually matter, any kind of matter, it can be mixed, sure, but everything that was there, is still there, it just... rearranges itself. Imagine it like Jacob changing hats. It's always Jacob wearing them, it's always a hat, but it can look very different depending on what he found in the cupboard today. Water is always two hydrogen atoms and an oxygen atom. Even if you put something else in it, that won't disappear. You can't actually destroy anything in the galaxy, not really. Nothing ever, truly, dies. There is parts of your bones, your blood, your organs, whether you know it or not, that was thrown out of an exploding star, millennia ago.
[ She lifts her hand with the coffee, giggling. ] I wouldn't put it past Jacob's part of that cosmic dust to be wearing three layers and a hat then either.
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You are ridiculous.
[ But there's something beautiful about the thought that everyone and everything has once been part of a star. ]
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So Angel does the only sensible thing when faced with being unappreciated.
She leans over and licks his cheek. Not teasingly, or enticingly, or sexily to get his attention as she might if she were being coy to get his attention. Just a big old mlem on his face. ]
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Why? ]
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Then settled her cup down beside her with that still faintly challenging air. So, what was he going to do about it? ]
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He's going to lean in and do the same thing to her. ]
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Connor!
[ And now her face is slimey, petulantly whining. So she leaves over and rubs her cheek aggressively on his shoulder to get it off. ]
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You started it.
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But you never do it back, you normally just squish me to make me stop.
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I guess it's better than tickling. [ G r u m p s.
But she drops down off the edge of the counter. Finishing off the rest of her coffee with a heavy mouthful to drain it and set it back down. ] Right I'm going to... change. Just keeps the doors unlocked, okay? See you in a minute.
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He nods, quickly kisses the top of her head, and starts gathering the dishes to wash up. ]
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But not that much later, there is that clip-clop of hooves as she steps out from their room. Delicate movements for something so big. Or at least tried to leave the room - the first time her horns clunk on the door frame before she huffs a breath and lowers her head to get out properly this time.
Then steps around the table, pressing her long snout into the back of his shoulders in greeting, rubbing and back and forth in an affectionate hello. Ruffling his hair in the huffed deep breathes of an animal.
After which she drops what she was holding in her teeth. Her dress falling over his head for him to catch. A practical thing, eventually she'll need to change back and will need clothes.
And perhaps a little bit because she, for once, in this form is tall enough to drop something on his head instead of the other way around. Though she can't talk, there is laughter in the star lit black eyes. ]
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Angel.
[ Honestly.
He huffs softly, and reaches up to pull the dress down. ]
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But with it, she turns and walks herself over to the door - he'll finish the washing up soon, and until then, she lays down by the doorframe, dropping her head onto the floor, watching and waiting for him. ]
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Once he's finished washing up, he folds the dress up neatly and carefully puts it in the bag he's prepared for himself. Then he hoists it over his shoulder, and heads for the door. ]
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Well at least she was doing it with him and for that, she trots at a comfortable step at ease despite the strangeness of it all. ]