video; birkenstocks in space (un: j.calhoun)

[bardish]

[ Here's a face peering into the communication device, all up close and personal, before he blinks and pulls his face back. When he speaks, it's in a hushed, panicky whisper: an anxious soliloquy. ] ...is this rolling? [ Blink. ] Shit! It's so rolling! What was I gonna say? I had a whole thing prepared and-- Ahh... Oh god...

[ Do something, Jeff. You can't just stand there like a deer staring at an oncoming 18-wheeler. ]

Uh. Hi...? [ A nervous wave. ] Hello! Greetings? I'm, uh-- I'm not really sure if this is the right place to ask, because I don't know if anyone's alive or dead-- [ Aside: ] Is that guy from the video still around, or is he...?

[ He makes a face, wrinkling his nose at the unpleasantness. Jeff may be looking a little green around the gills here. ]

Anyway...

My name's Jeff and I totally come in peace! Is there anyone out there? Anyone who, like, wears shoes in a men's size 10, who might have an extra pair lying around, because I could really use something other than sandals right now. I mean, they're good shoes, super comfortable, but I'm pretty sure flip-flops aren't appropriate footwear for this kind of place, like, it just seems wrong to walk around here with my toes out-- what if I catch some kind of crazy new strain of tetanus!

[ AWKWARD BEAT. He smiles, grins, way too toothy, like a man on the verge of a panic attack, but he's really trying here. ]

I'm really not picky! As long as they cover my feet! You know, because once I've got the right shoes, then it's all gonna be fine. It's fine. Everything fine! [ Keep telling yourself that, Jeff. ] So... Men's size 10! [ He even holds up 10 fingers, to illustrate. Then he closes his fists into two enthusiastic thumbs up. ] That's all! Thanks!

Comments

video; un: cabernet

[redwinekindofgirl]

[Right, she can't help with the shoes thing (Julie is 5'5" and built like a bird, there's no chance of help here), but one question really does beg the asking when she's finished listening to this guy.]

Uh... hey, dude. Are you okay?

[She feels like he is definitely not okay.]

[bardish]

Oh yeah, I'm okay! Fine-- I'm fine, totally, totally fine, there's nothing wrong here.

[ He smiles unconvincingly. Nods even more unconvincingly. Keeps it up for a couple of beats, before he exhales, shoulders sagging, and rubs the side of his neck. ]

Okay, that's a lie, but I think it might be for the best if I just keep lying to myself and others, because if I keep talking, I'll start to panic, and if I start to panic, I can't guarantee that I won't throw up or cry or maybe do both at once, and I don't think anybody needs to see that, because it would be the worst first impression to have here, so. Um. In conclusion, I'm fine!

[redwinekindofgirl]

[He lies, and her brows raise. It isn't even a particularly good lie.


Not convincing at all.]

Okay... but you know, like, half this place is freaking the fuck out anyway? So no one's gonna think you're some kind of freak if you lose your mind over this shit for a few hours. [Julie smiles, shrugs.]

I already did my 'find a room and scream at the walls for thirty minutes' thing. It's cathartic.

[bardish]

[ Okay, okay. Now he actually seems to be moving back from the brink of a total and complete panic attack. Jeff exhales again, brow still creased with worry, and nods. ]

Well... That does put things into perspective.

[ A beat, as he has a think about things. ]

But what if-- hypothetically-- I lose my mind over this shit for, like, a solid week before it dulls into a kind of numb grief complete with terrible coping mechanisms?

[ ANOTHER BEAT. ]

I'm sorry, I really shouldn't be putting this hypothetical situation on you.

[redwinekindofgirl]

[Julie looks as if she's really giving that some thought. Granted, after her father died... that's more or less what she did, but he doesn't need to know that.]

No, I mean-- fuck, I get it, okay? You don't need to know why, but... I get it.

[God, she wishes she didn't get it.]

Drinking helps, but I don't know if that's your thing.

[bardish]

[ He offers a smile, grateful and a little rueful. Empathy and curiosity has him wanting to learn a little more about why, but that's not exactly something he's going to push at right off the bat. She doesn't want to elaborate, and he's basically a stranger, so! Focusing on the here and now, for the time being. ]

It's not really my thing. [ Anymore. And while he can manage a drink or two under purely social circumstances, there's no way he can trust himself to stick with moderation with how crazy stressful he finds this situation. ] Usually I just run until I'm too tired to freak out anymore. Totally lame, I know!

[redwinekindofgirl]

Exercise works. I have asthma, soooo... [She makes a see-sawing motion with one hand.]

I can run, but I might also die.

[That's not why she chooses drinking, and it's a stupid idea for her to smoke pot but she does it anyway, but she hasn't found an inhaler here yet and she's not about to chance an asthma attack.]

But I'm up for a walk or something. If you want.

[bardish]

Oh. That would be unfortunate.

[ AN UNDERSTATEMENT. A... very sincere understatement! ]

A walk it is, then! [ THUMBS UP. ] A nice, leisurely walk around an abandoned space colony!

We could even go at a brisk pace if we feel like living on the edge.

[redwinekindofgirl]

Oh, daring. [She flashes a grin at him, a dimple showing beside straight white teeth, then she nods.]

Meet you at the park? Sounds like a good place for a walk.

[And wherever they want from there, but it seems like as good a place as any to meet.]