text, un: yourstruly.

[floozie]

Attention, everyone!

If there are any aspiring butlers or maids in this sewer looking for a job, know that I'd be happy to help your budding careers by hiring you to be my full-time caretaker. As the position's unpaid you'll be working for exposure, but I'm totally willing to write you a great reference after I release you from my service.

Veterans with at least five years of experience in the industry are also welcome. You think you're first rate now? With my help you could be the best.





In the meantime, while I wait for applicants to pour in, could anyone lend me a shirt?

Comments

text; @GOSUCKADICK

[substances]

sure ill do it

[floozie]

Hey, that's great! You start immediately.

Part of being my caretaker also includes bragging rights, so we're going to need to tell all the pessimists (or just your favourites) who didn't believe we'd find each other to do exactly what your username says. How about it?

[substances]

wat? no interview? u dont even wanna kno my name??
man i was lookin forward to gettin all dressed up & shit

but sure ok
ill brag all u like

[floozie]

(hm. maybe he's right. he was just so excited to not do chores......)

You can tell me, I guess, but if you don't wind up working out I can just fire you. That said, I'd never stop you from getting all dressed up. In fact, I insist that you do.

See how well this is going already?👍

[substances]

[See, an interview might have been wise - Klaus is not good at chores. He's also being a troll. Sorry.]

klaus hargreeves @ ur service
okok
important q
wats ur definition of dressin up?

just gotta kno my job description

[floozie]

(both outcomes were destined to be the same regardless. zelos never takes anything seriously; they're two peas in a pod.)

A blouse under a cummerbund under a suit jacket. Tie or bowtie, gentleman's choice.

Do you have what it takes?

[substances]

[Excellent. The beginning of a beautiful friendship.]

bummer
i have the best ballgown
perfect 4 vacuuming

course i do

[floozie]

Sorry, for a second there I thought you were a guy.

You are a guy, aren't you? Your name's Klaus.

(he is, however, having trouble with this one. he was raised with very old-fashioned mindsets............)

[substances]

[Oh, this is precious.]

i mean whos judgin?
the gender binary is SO overrated

[floozie]

Gender binary?

I don't think I've ever heard a term like that before. So what is it?

[substances]

[What? Is this a teachable moment? God, Klaus can't remember the last time he taught anyone a damn thing. Except that time he taught someone how to get high recently. Whoops.]

o its uh
the whole concept of like
ur gender is the same as ur sex?
like u gotta dress a certain way or liek certain things dependin on wats between ur legs

u kno?

the whole concept is SOOO last century
like early last century

[floozie]

Right.

Is the fact that you like to wear dresses the main point I should be taking away here?

[substances]

[....that went well.]

i wear watever i like ;)

u should try it sumtime

[floozie]

No dresses, since I like them on ladies well enough that I'd never dream of stealing their thunder, but no one can say I'm not in touch with my feminine side. Pink looks fantastic on me. I also like frilly blouses, silks, and bows.

People should be allowed to do whatever, even if naysayers don't understand why. So knock yourself out, man.

[substances]

well thats 1 way of lookin at it i guess
man frilly blouses are the best
i didnt get 2 bring any of the ones i had at home
but i steal clothes from my gf all the time
all her tshirts r crop tops on me tho shes tiny

neway wat chores do u have 2 do already?

[floozie]

That's too bad, because they have awful fashion sense here. Except for that guy in the welcome video; he was wearing a pretty nice uniform.

I have laundry, cooking, and cleaning to do. I ruined my first shirt, which is why I'm just hanging around half-naked, and I don't mind doing some cooking. My biggest issue is that this place is filthy and cleaning's not my strong suit (because it's boring). You know how it is.

[substances]

srsly they do
just abysmal

[Okay he started out trolling and now he's starting to feel a little bad. What gives, man?]

fair warning im shit at chores
but sure

[floozie]

(wealth isn't all it's cracked up to be, bro, you feel me.)

Have faith, Klaus. You can't be any worse than me! LMAO

I'm sure something around here will look polished eventually.