video; @crowley

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

This isn't London either.

[That much, it would seem, is completely obvious... but the young man on the screen isn't addressing his audience when he says it. He looks like he's just stepped out of the decontamination area after retrieving his belongings and more or less booking it away, and he doesn't look like he's impressed with any of this despite the dark sunglasses concealing his eyes.]

Look, this is getting ridiculous-- and don't tell me, people here haven't figured out a way to get the-- Somewhere back home either?

[He pulls in a breath, sharply and through his teeth, and grimaces.]

At least tell me there's a decent bar.

Comments

@KaballsDeep | Audio

[kaballin]

The bar fucking sucks. The bartender only knows how to make tequila sunrises and gets pissed when you go behind the bar to pour your own shit.

Shitty service. Crappy labels. Everything bad.

So you know, welcome to Anchor or whatever.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

Cheers, I think.

[He doesn't sound entirely sure that he ought to be thanking anyone just yet.]

I'm used to being self-sufficient.

[kaballin]

Then maybe it'll remind you of home or someshit. If home is a badly decorated sci-fi prop anyway.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

Not the last time I checked. This place feels better than the last one I was in, anyway.

[kaballin]

How bad was it? Cuz someone told me they came from a place that ran on hugs - which I think might be the worst thing I've ever heard.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

Just felt like being in Hell, all the time.

[Except it wasn't anything like Hell, and that was just the most unsettling thing about it.]

You might be giving me some competition with that one, though.

[kaballin]

Hell never made me hug anyone.

Think I'd rather rot.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

It's a niche, but I never thought of forced physical contact as a torture method. You learn new things all the time.

[kaballin]

There's all kinds of new and exciting ways for eternal torment if you're clever enough.

But that one is particularly sinister.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

Yes, well, they're determined to stick with the classics. I can't even get them on board with electricity.

[kaballin]

Okay but think of all the fun torture techniques that involve zapping people.

Or even just putting someone in a room with a flickering florescent they can't fix or shatter.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

You don't have to tell me that. I've sent so many memos you could wallpaper a house with them.

[kaballin]

No one ever listens to the guys with the good ideas. It's our lot in life.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

Right! You get it.

[Honestly, so few people actually get it.]

My ideas are great.

[kaballin]

It's everyone else who's the problem.

[Just two guys who are surrounded by idiots.]

Sucks that's the case even here.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

I'm not surprised by that.

[And he doesn't sound too bothered, either. He shrugs.]

Mostly humans here, isn't it.

[kaballin]

Humans and robots.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

Oh, yeah, the robots. [Hmmmmmm.]

They're interesting.

[kaballin]

Not a lot of robots where you come from?

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

Ehh, not like these ones. They don't turn around and talk to you like they're people.

[But humans are all about that kind of thing right now, so who knows...]

[kaballin]

These ones think they are people. Hell maybe they were. That happened back home, weird ass clan of ninjas turning people into robots for some reason. To make an army I guess. Always seemed fucking stupid to me.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

[Hold up.]

Yeah. Yeah, sounds something like that. [Sounds like the plot of some kind of sci-fi show.]

Why not just use the people? Tried and tested.

[kaballin]

No fucking clue. The one I knew was way better at literally everything as a person than as a robot. Also it just pissed him off so there's that too.

But some people have dumb ideas and then run with it. Who knows.

[saunteredvaguelydownwards]

Yeah, seen a lot of that.

[And the things he could quote from history...]

But the curiosity of humans seems to work out well in the long run, as a general rule.

[kaballin]

I guess? Too bad the curious ones go and get themselves killed - because we're running out of fodder for bad decisions.