text, un: yourstruly.

[floozie]

Attention, everyone!

If there are any aspiring butlers or maids in this sewer looking for a job, know that I'd be happy to help your budding careers by hiring you to be my full-time caretaker. As the position's unpaid you'll be working for exposure, but I'm totally willing to write you a great reference after I release you from my service.

Veterans with at least five years of experience in the industry are also welcome. You think you're first rate now? With my help you could be the best.





In the meantime, while I wait for applicants to pour in, could anyone lend me a shirt?

Comments

[floozie]

(THAT'S A WEIRD FLEX PETEY, PLEASE LOVE YOURSELF.)

How exciting. I'm staking my claim on one now. How long do you think the repairs will take?

1/3

[floozie]

Lunafreya is such a pretty name. I'm sure it pales in comparison to her good looks and charm. Thumbs up if she's single.👍

2/3

[floozie]

👍👍👍👍👍

3/3

[floozie]

This is actually pretty fun.

[livingdeadgirl]

consider it working for exposure

[floozie]

(dishwashers are an entirely new hurdle for spoiled brats to jump, genji. don't bite off more than you can chew!!)

A clan?

What's your full name?

1/2

[fessus]

Okay cool you figured it out

[ bUT ALSO ]

2/2

[fessus]

👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎👎

[arcadedragon]

Genji Shimada.

If you're going to try to assassinate me I'd recommend against it.

[He managed to only flood his kitchen which he's considering a minor miracle.]

text; @GOSUCKADICK

[substances]

sure ill do it

[floozie]

I line you guys up like this and you give me such lazy comebacks.

Are you mad I thought to ask or something?

[floozie]

Hey, that's great! You start immediately.

Part of being my caretaker also includes bragging rights, so we're going to need to tell all the pessimists (or just your favourites) who didn't believe we'd find each other to do exactly what your username says. How about it?

[floozie]

You'll find that I'm a pretty quick learner. I just don't like to bother most of the time.

Got any more you can show me? Or should I start figuring these out on my own.

[substances]

wat? no interview? u dont even wanna kno my name??
man i was lookin forward to gettin all dressed up & shit

but sure ok
ill brag all u like

[floozie]

(i'm so proud of you, man... brings a tear to my eye...)

I'm not in that kind of work, don't worry; I was just clarifying something for myself.

Turns out I don't know you at all. Great news, right?

[fessus]

Wow you just moved on from me shutting you down on her behalf like nothing happened.... hey

[ Why aren't you properly devastated, how is your self-esteem LIKE THIS ]

Yeah? I mean there's tons, it could be a whole class that I could teach for a year lmao, I'm the master of all things digital 🧠

[floozie]

(hm. maybe he's right. he was just so excited to not do chores......)

You can tell me, I guess, but if you don't wind up working out I can just fire you. That said, I'd never stop you from getting all dressed up. In fact, I insist that you do.

See how well this is going already?👍

[livingdeadgirl]

im not mad
but only because im halfway convinced youre trolling
theres no way youre actually this entitled right

1/2

[floozie]

(INDOMITABLE

also he gets criticized for it like, every five minutes. so it just sort of rolls off of him now.)

That was a shut down? Put more effort in and maybe I'll notice the next one.

Don't make it into a formal class, then I definitely won't want to learn any new ones. That's a cute brain, though. Are there any hearts?

2/2

[floozie]

(oh. would you look at that? typing "heart" brought up a whole serious of suggestions!)

Perfect.❤️

Man, I rule.

[floozie]

You're so right, I can't believe you caught me. Why would a rich aristocrat raised by rich aristocrats be entitled?

What's "trolling" anyway?

[fessus]

No way, I'm not a tryhard. [ this fucking logic man it's just incredible ]

Don't you think it's kinda weird to be focused on girls when we've just been teleported to some weird space colony or smth? Ig over time or w/e but I'm more into ☄️🏃‍♂️🧟‍♂️

That's me riding a meteor back home, the zombie's just bc I think he's cool.

[substances]

[See, an interview might have been wise - Klaus is not good at chores. He's also being a troll. Sorry.]

klaus hargreeves @ ur service
okok
important q
wats ur definition of dressin up?

just gotta kno my job description

[arcadedragon]

[Lil cyber ninja growing up.]

If you say so.

Should I know who you are?

[livingdeadgirl]

trolling is when you try to make people mad on the internet for fun
often through a pretense of sincerity while secretly misrepresenting yourself
so forgive me for taking your words with a grain of salt
if you are in fact a rich aristocrat though
you at least have enough self awareness to know how youre acting
and to know its because of your upbringing
which suggests to me that you also understand the absurdity of your so called job offer