redshiftrp | @lazarus

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@lazarus | video

[ The video opens on Ben's face. He is looking particularly grim, filming in one of the rooms in the residential section. No greetings or build-up, he just cuts right to the chase, holding up a tiny device between forefinger and thumb. Visible is a tiny lens, and what looks like a small antennae to transmit. ]

PSA. There are surveillance cameras hidden in the lighting fixtures of the bedrooms. I found a creepy tunnel leading to a creepy lair where some fucking creep has been spying on us. Still trying to figure out who is behind it and what they want, but the feeds only show occupied rooms and no empty ones so it's not a coincidence, unfortunately.

[ Ben turns the frame to face the spot where the small camera had obviously been ripped out of an overhead light. From offscreen he says, voice clipped and angry: ]

Anyway. Wanted you guys to know. Hit me up if you need help ripping the suckers out. I'll post again when I know more.

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"Whaaaaat?!"

Ben's faint excitement over the idea quickly blossoms into surprised delight. This! This is something he can fix! This is something unquestionably good, to share with his friend! Cole had been having a Day, too, with all the negativity and fighting and ambient anger over the situation with the cameras.

He lifts his head from Cole's shoulder, hopping off the table and grinning at him. Every now and then, on rare instances, this boyish, excitable side of Ben bursts forth. It's something innate to him, something that hadn't been entirely stamped out - not by Reginald and not by being dead and not by everything else in between.

"Well, we gotta do something about that, come on!"

The mess hall isn't far, and the entire walk there, there's a bounce in Ben's step, a giddy lightness in him. When he checks in the communal freezer, there aren't exactly a ton of options, but there are a few. Plenty of folks had been willing to brave the zombies in the Whole Foods, in order to bring back a little piece of home.

In this case that little piece of home is a container of cherry ice cream, an almost-empty one of dark chocolate, and some french vanilla. Ben lays them out on the counter, opening each and then fishing around to get himself and Cole spoons. He hands one over with that same beaming grin.

"We would get ice cream after missions sometimes and maybe it's stupid but I still just - love it."

Probably there's plenty of fucked up stuff to unpack there and if it were anyone else, he wouldn't say it, knowing that it would just sound childish or pathetic or who knows what they would think. But... Cole won't judge him, for this. He takes a spoonful of the chocolate, first, leaning against the counter with his hip as he eats it.

Cole feels that bubble swell and encompass them, the pop of excitement and bright tang of glee. He slides off the table, trotting along after Ben.

"Would people want more of this?"

Ben's thinking people go out, risk safety for this, and that means that it makes them feel better, too. And Cole can help. "Because I could go and get some. If people would like that." He takes the offered spoon and watches Ben, and he can feel the joy, the warmth of Mom's smile, the promise of a better day tomorrow, the heavy satisfaction of Sir being proud, just for a moment, proud enough to tell them they performed adequately.

Cole scrapes a tiny bit of the chocolate with the edge of the spoon. "It's not as hard as I thought it would be." And then he lifts the spoon, still looking at Ben for reassurance, and his tongue flicks out to taste the tiniest bit.

It's an explosion of flavour. Cold and bitter and so incredibly sweet and clean, bright as fresh snow and sweeter than Vivienne's perfumes or stolen honey.

His eyes are like saucers, filled with shock and wonder.

[ Wow it really is the wildest thing, giving advice and actually being listened to. Ben had just been expecting, without really noticing he was, that Peter would reject his words out of hand and just do whatever he wanted. Klaus had always done that when Ben was a ghost - well, okay, not always, but a lot of the time. It feels good... being heeded. The same way it feels good still to be able to touch people and to do simple things like sleep and eat and even though he's starting to get used to them, it hits him sometimes, at moments like this, how good it is being alive again. ]

You'll think of the right thing to say.

[ There's certainty in Ben's voice as he says it; he believes in Peter a great deal, even if Peter doesn't always believe in Peter all that much.

And he listens, corners of his mouth gradually curling more and more into a smile, as Ben explains how he'd ended up toppling into a pool. Ben covers his mouth with his hand but the smile is still all too visible, and his eyes are sparkling with amusement. ]

Oh, man. That is just... that's the best thing I've ever heard.

[ From the sound of it, Poison does know Peter very well, had known just what to say to help him get around his awkwardness with words, to encourage him to take that first step. And that first step had led to him dunking himself in a hot springs, but that only makes it more endearing. It wouldn't have been, if she'd laughed at him or turned him down, but she hadn't. And now Peter - who he remembers talking to about how almost no one here was his age and he should resign himself to being dateless and alone forever - has someone making him grin like this even on such a hard day. So maybe the world is good after all. ]

You just went straight for the kiss? Damn, that's brave as hell. I'm impressed.

[ He's teasing a little, but he means it, too. And then, because Peter doesn't have a brother to do it for him and someone ought to, Ben reaches up and ruffles Peter's hair, genuinely proud and deliberately obnoxious at the same time. ]

[Peter's been trying to be better at taking advice lately. He hasn't been very good about it when it comes to people telling him to slow down for fuck's sake, but in other ways, he's gotten better. When Patch had suggested he dumb down his scientific talk for other people he'd listened, and had been able to explain a few things to Kieran the literal cowboy by following that advice. This falls in the same category of hey-idiot-learn-to-communicate-better, and that is something he at least thinks he's improving on.

tl;dr Peter's going to follow Ben's advice and figure out a way to break all this to Poison, but for now he's going to let his mind wander away from all of the horrible, scary stuff that's going on for a moment so he can gush about her. After he laughs and playfully swats at Ben's hand before running his fingers through his hair. How dare you mess up his hair BEN.]

Yeah man, I just- I just went for it, and totally beefed it. Like brave, maybe? Stupid, absolutely. I can't remember the last time I was so embarrassed, oh my God. So then I'm just standing there in this pool, fully clothed, looking like the biggest, soggiest dipshit who has ever lived. I guess she was just like 'yes, this is the idiot I want to date', and then she kissed me and- and she's way better at it than I am, like, no joke. Out of all the things I've stupidly bumbled into, this is definitely the best one.

"Probably. I mean, everybody's different, but a lot of people love ice cream."

He knows how Cole wants to help out, to comfort people who aren't doing so well. There are other ways he can do that, of course, but getting more ice cream can't hurt.

"I can go with you, if you want."

Ben remembers, with a little rush of happiness, that's how they'd first met. Okay, so at the time he'd found Cole pretty unsettling, terrified of the idea of someone who could see into his thoughts and knew his memories, alarmed by the way he spoke and all the stuff he'd said about himself and about Ben. But now, that memory is recast in the glow of getting to know him better, realizing he wasn't a threat, understanding that it's not such a bad thing, to be seen and known.

He gives Cole and encouraging little nod when he looks up for guidance, as if this were something a little intimidating to do. And Ben supposes maybe it is. He might need reassurance if he was trying dragon candy or whatever is the local ice-cream-like treat popular in Thedas.

When Cole tries the ice cream and his eyes go wide like that, Ben beams; even better than just eating the ice cream himself is sharing it with Cole. Food is always better with company, and in this case, it's more than just food. It's taking something he associates with happiness and introducing his friend to it, like an offering. As if he could take all that happiness in his two hands and offer it over to Cole.

"Do you like it? You can try one of the other flavors, too. There's tons more than just this. That one's chocolate and that over there is vanilla and this is some kinda cherry."

[ Ben grins, totally unrepentant despite the swatting, and goes back to listening. It's always been something he enjoyed, listening to people talk about their loved ones and friends and people they care about. Something in Peter just lights up talking about Poison, and if anything good at all has come out of this shitty day and everything that's happened in it, it is finding out that this wonderful thing has been going on without him realizing.

He can't help a soft snort of laughter at Peter describing himself as a soggy dipshit. Maybe it's just that he - and apparently Poison - find earnestness (clumsiness included) to be way more endearing than suave confidence and polish. He actually sets a hand over his heart, because it's way too cute and it's making Peter happy (and hopefully her, too) and that's such great news. ]

I'm seriously so happy for you, man. When did all this start, I mean, did you know for a while you were into her, or you were friends and then something changed recently...?

[ He might not be loud about it but there's a side to Ben that's a complete and utter sap, and he wants all the mushy deets that Peter is willing to provide him. Klaus is having feelings for Julie and now Peter and Poison and it seems like things are just working out, romantically speaking, for people he cares about. Ben just wants a little of that good good vicarious joy. Since obviously, nothing like this is ever going to happen for him. ]

[Honestly Peter really needed this break. Nothing is completely hopeless, it's not the end of the world, he has a cool girlfriend and people like Ben around to help him deal with shit. He's still got a lot to figure out about their current predicament, but he's starting to feel like he can handle this. It's just another hurdle to jump over, and he's real good at jumping. He's got this.

He might roll his eyes just a bit when Ben puts his hand over his heart. Come on man, you're acting like his aunt. But it's good, Peter's all grins over here.]

I-- honestly, we started as friends. I think I realized that I liked her back in Hadriel, but it was, uh. It wasn't until towards the end, and by then we were all literally gearing up to go to war and there just wasn't time for anything else. Right after that everyone started going home. I figured I was never going to see her again, y'know? So I tried not to get too attached. but-- but then she was here, and so was I, and things just kinda fell into place. And also that Cole guy was like "dude you should stop being a dumb anxious chihuahua and tell her how you feel". Only not in those words, because it's Cole.

[ Talking about Poison is working better than anything else Ben had done to try to reassure Peter all day, and so Ben doesn't intend to stop asking questions anytime soon. But his motives aren't entirely selfless; it's just good, seeing Peter happy and hearing a story about something working out for once.

He nods along as Peter tells him about all the delays, all the reasons he used to justify not getting invested. Ben knows a little something about playing that particular game. Maybe not over a person in the same way, but he'd felt like that almost nonstop when he first got here. Not wanting to let himself believe in being alive again because it might end or turn out not to be real. But then it had finally sunk in that this really was a second chance.

And apparently it had sunk in for Peter that he might actually get to be with Poison. When Peter mentions that Cole had been the one to give him a little push in the right direction, Ben just beams. ]

Yeeeaaahhh, I'm pretty sure Cole's never said dude before in his life, but I get you.

[ He wonders if his other friend knows about how successfully he'd played Cupid in this case. He'll have to ask him later. For now, he stays focused on Peter and his cute love story. ]

So... what do you like about her? And I mean, was there a moment you realized, or was it gradual?

[ Ben doesn't know Poison all that well, and even if he did, he wouldn't see her the way that Peter sees her. And he's curious about it. What marks the tipping point between enjoying someone as a friend and knowing you've got feelings for them. What is that distinction, according to Peter? And what is it about Poison that makes her special above others, to him? ]

[Right something working out FOR ONCE. Peter's so glad it did and honestly kind of low key terrified that he's going to fuck it up somehow, but right now things are good. With Poison, at least. Everything else kind of sucks.]

I think it was gradual, but man, what don't I like about her. She's just- she's been through a lot, been stuck in a bunch of other shitty places like this one, and she just- she hasn't let it beat her, y'know? She's just so strong and determined, like whenever something knocks her down, she just gets back up again. I mean, there's a lot about her that I like obviously, she's really talented and she doesn't put up with my bullshit when I'm doing something dumb, but that really stands out the most to me, I think.

[ Ben can't help smiling, listening to Peter. Of course, he likes her for her strength and determination and resilience - because Peter is all those things, too, without seeming to know it about himself. Ben just bets that if he were to ask Poison the same question (and if she felt inclined to answer it) she would list some of those exact same qualities.

But he actually bursts out laughing once Peter mentions her not putting up with his bullshit. His eyes are sparkling with amusement and he nods while tries to fight back the giggles and choke out: ]

Yep, I can see how that would- would really help.

[ He's just giving Peter a hard time, of course - compared to Klaus or Diego or hell any of Ben's siblings, Peter's daily amount of bullshit and making dumb choices is so small. But there's something charming about knowing the two of them are so equal, that she doesn't let him get away with anything ridiculous. Ben feels even more glad he'd argued for Peter to tell her, now. She'll probably be a great ally to have, in all this. ]

You know I told her I'd go and check her room for any extra cameras after we were done here. Should I - are you guys keeping this on the DL or is it okay to tell her I know?

You're just having a blast right now, aren't you.

[Yeah yeah, laugh it up. Peter's not bothered by it, but he is rolling his eyes because of course he is, and giving Ben's shoulder a gentle nudge.]

It really does help, though. She's also like, my second brain. I can't even count how many times I've forgotten to eat lunch. But yeah, it's no problem. I mean, I don't think it's meant to be a big secret or anything, and like, why would I hide it? She's amazing.

Oh.

[She folds her arms loosely while she follows him, a frown furrowing between her eyebrows. None of this feels right, and it isn't just because of the cameras.

Maybe they're motion triggered. Maybe they're heat triggered. There are all kinds of ways to make sure you're not just filming an empty room, and this place has technology like she's never seen before even if it's full of weird glitches.

But then he talks about the footage from her room, and she presses her lips together. The back of his jaw clenches slightly before she speaks.]

... Yeah. You might wanna not watch it. [Julie trusts she doesn't need to say why.] And I send Klaus a message, but he didn't reply yet.

Little bit, yeah.

[ Mostly he is having a blast because Peter doesn't look like he's carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders for once. He seems like a happy, goofy, normal teen, who is so excited to talk about his new girlfriend and all the things he likes about her. And from the sound of it, Poison has Peter's back, and much as he surely must have hers. What a good pair they must make. ]

Hey, man, I don't know why you would, either, I just figured I'd ask. Some people like keeping stuff to themselves. But she sure sounds amazing to me.

[ His smile softens a little, and Ben adds, with conviction: ]

...And I'm not gonna let anything bad happen to the two of you. Not if I can help it.

[ He might not be a tech whiz and he might not have seen this coming and he might be a traumatized wreck and he might not know how they're going to solve it yet, but no way is he letting some creep ruin Peter's happiness. Not now that he's just found some. Ben reluctantly turns back to those screens, and says: ]

So... how 'bout we switch over to the footage from my room and I can scan through quickly and tell you whether or not I've got any unwanted visitors or weird gaps or- or patterns we should pay attention to, while you use that big head of yours to start thinking up some new security systems?

I wasn't going to, trust me.

[ He has no illusions about a few of the things that might be on that footage that his brother might be involved in, but even beyond that, it's not something he would ever do. And he turns to Julie to say, expression grave: ]

As far as I'm concerned, watching any of that, even if we did it to catch whoever's responsible, that would make us just as bad as them. I just wanted to reassure you... that it isn't gonna happen. I can promise that.

[ Then he goes back to climbing up onto that chair, reaching for the light fixture, gently prying it loose with his fingertips, reaching in and... ]

Ah ha.

[ He plucks out a tiny camera, holding it out for Julie to inspect, if she wants to. He'll need it back, to give to Qubit for research, but he thinks there might be some comfort in seeing the thing itself, concrete and there.

Ben settles the lighting fixture back in place, everything neat and tight and secure, before hopping down again. ]

If he doesn't text in a couple hours, maybe let me know? I know... it's not your job babysitting him or... reporting to me, I just-

[ He quirks his mouth to the side, letting out a frustrated small breath. He doesn't want to say it. Doesn't want to talk about it, like, at ALL. But he wants to at least give Julie a sense of the potential reactions, the general reasons for Ben's worry that Klaus might be a little unsettled. ]

Our dad used cameras. In our rooms and all through the house and he'd- [ Nope, that's the end of that sentence. ] Anyway just. It super might not be a problem, but in case it is, just... just lemme know if you can't find him, okay?

My hero.

[He sounds like he's totally goofing, but the smile he gives Ben is warm and genuine. As much as being trapped out here sucks, he's so glad he got to meet someone like him. What a good goddamn dude Ben is, Peter would absolutely snap a man in half for him.

He sighs, turning his attention back to the computer and nodding. Yeeeah, it's probably time to get back to work. He pulls the footage of Ben's room up, not starting it up just yet.]

You want me to leave the room so you can watch it by yourself?

[ It's actually closer to an hour and a half by the time Ben arrives. Reviewing the footage had proved... a lot more eventful than he's expected. But Peter's semi-meltdown had actually done a lot to distract Ben from his own bullshit, to give him a task and help him focus on the here and now rather than his own issues.

He is a little uneasy, talking to her, knowing there had been an intruder in this room without telling her. But Peter had said he was going to do that later, and he knows her best, it'll be best coming from him.

And it is even more of a good idea that he'd realized before, going over this place with a fine-tooth comb, for anything else that intruder might have planted. Ben knocks, waits for Poison to let him inside, eyes already scrutinizing the door and frame for any sign of it being forced open. ]

Hey, sorry I'm a little late.

[ Ben considers for a long moment. A part of him wants to say yes, because it is his instinct to be private, to hide everything, from everyone, without question. But Peter hadn't hidden, from him. Ben had just given him those big speeches about relying on other people, not facing stuff alone. Wouldn't it make him a hypocrite, then, to make Peter leave the room, just because a few things on the footage might be a little embarrassing? ]

No, it's fine.

[ Then, as he's looking at the screen, jaw set, he admits: ]

Actually, I really don't wanna do this alone, so. You don't have to watch with me, if you wanna start coming up with some traps or whatever but. I'd appreciate if you stay in the room.

[ And he clicks the button to start the footage. He's tempted to poke at the settings, find a way to speed it up, get it over with. But then he remembers how brief that flash of a bulky figure coming in had been on Peter's footage. There might be more clues here he would miss if he tried to just race through. So he makes himself just watch, cycles of him sleeping and reading, Klaus coming in and 'borrowing' things from his closet, his desk. Ben shakes his head at that, mouth quirked to the side.

There are other, less pleasant things. They'd chosen to keep some footage of him having nightmares. The feed is silent, but him tossing around in his sleep, the way the door to Klaus's room opens and his sleepy head pokes in to check on Ben... suggests there was a certain amount of noisiness. Jaw set, Ben laces his fingers together tight in his lap, and keeps watching.

He doesn't see a figure coming in his room, like he'd seen with Peter's. But there are gaps in the footage where it cuts off abruptly. How many of those gaps are just cutting out boring down time, and how many are concealing potential incursions? ]

It keeps doing that. Do you see? When we're not in the room, sometimes the camera just zooms in on... like, our shit. Why the fuck would anyone care about my book or - or headphones?

Oh, I'm gonna go all-out Home Alone on this place, don't you worry about it.

[There are gonna be so many booby traps up in here. But for now, Peter's going to do what Ben wants and stay in the room with him while the video plays. He pays less attention to Ben himself in the videos, since Peter's more focused on watching the background for weird sneak creepers. He does lean back in his chair and rub his chin in thought when it starts zooming in on stuff, and then Ben voices the same thing that he has on his mind.]

Yeah, I noticed that, it's weird. Like, they're not exactly important, but-- I dunno, there's gotta be some kind of significance behind it?

Realistically, Cole hasn't actually eaten any, just tasted the smallest amount across his tongue, trying to process the stark extremes of it. It's more intense than anything he's ever had.

"I know what cherries are," he comments. "And people on the Fleet talked about chocolate, especially chocolate pudding, but I never ate any." He takes another tiny lap and shivers, eyes falling shut to pick up the subtleties in the cold and sweet.

The flavour is good. But Ben's emotions? Those are intoxicating, filling him with a warmth he hasn't felt in so long. "Which do you like best?"

Hmm. Gotta be. We should... check the items that have gotten close ups. Make sure they haven't been replaced with close replicas or... changed or bugged or who knows.

[ And he starts making a mental note of which objects the camera seems to linger on. ]

Small silver lining, yeah, but I'm definitely not getting a perv vibe off this. None of this stuff they kept is like, me getting dressed or undressed or coming back from the shower or whatever, so they're not, like... holding onto that sort of thing.

[ It hardly makes the rest of it that much better, but it's something, and Ben's at least relieved over that, because Peter's one thousand percent too young to need to be worrying about any shit like that.

Another few days pass in the footage, Ben reading books, Ben sleeping, Ben not sleeping when he ought to be sleeping, Ben laughing to himself as he reads some message on the device - probably one from Peter, honestly. He has to pause, after that moment, because the look on his own face in the video is so happy, so unguarded. So blissfully sure he was alone and unwatched.

Ben hangs his head for a second, rubbing at the back of his neck and taking a few slow breaths, trying to will away that crawling awful feeling. Before Peter can even worry he says: ]

I'm fine- I'm fine I just. Need a sec.

[ God, they really are going to have to kick the shit out of whoever is responsible for this. Ben's not going to feel comfortable anywhere until they do... ]

[ She lets out a little puff of laughter - I mean, he's got her there, she pleads no contest. She really did want to know, before she realized what that would mean for her. Careful what you wish for, I guess!

Lotta questions there though, so, uh... going in order? She ticks them off on her fingers. ]

Yes, yes, no, and yes. [ The invisibility of ghosts was actually important in that memory she just remembered, but ain't nobody got time for that I guess - because actually his last question is the hardest one! Her relationship with Dave is Complicated. ]

Because he is stupid! Ugh. He's one of those people who can talk and talk and talk and talk, but if you try and engage him about anything important, he clams up like - like a clammy clam at a clam bake. [ She brushes a stray hair out of her face, irritated. ] There was this whole group of us whose past selves knew each other, and Dave remembered the most out of any of us, but he'd never talk about it, he'd just... drop these cryptic tidbits occasionally so we'd know he knew. It was so frustrating.

"Hmmm..."

Ben makes a considering noise, holding up a finger to indicate that Cole should wait while he takes a spoonful, first of the vanilla, then one of the cherry. He deliberates, though there's no real feeling of uncertainty or seriousness behind this show of impartial judgment. Just that radiating happiness, that feeling of sharing and togetherness and friendship, of profound joy at seeing Cole happy.

"I think it's the chocolate. Mint and chocolate was always my favorite, growing up."

For a minute Ben is thinking about those good times. Sneaking out to Griddy's and Luther pointing out to him that they'd added chocolate donuts with mint cream filling to the menu; Five stealing Ben a huge handful of the complimentary chocolate mints from the lobby of a hotel they'd saved from an evil stage magician; Klaus vaping chocolate-mint vapor right through Ben's face when he was acting gloomy on their 20th birthday...

And now, this. Tasting ice cream in the empty kitchen with Cole, seeing the wonder on his face. Ben hops up onto the counter, legs dangling down; he takes another spoonful of the chocolate, savoring it, savoring the entire situation.

"What about you?"

And he nods to the other flavors, encouraging Cole to try with them, too.

[ Well, those are at least a few details he can hold onto. This past version of Ami could see ghosts, even though that wasn't usual. Other people had been reincarnated, the same way she was. She's not a unique case, entirely.

And when she describes her friend (?) Dave - someone who makes a lot of noise but doesn't say anything or want to talk about the important stuff, Ben can't help a little smile. ]

Oh, yeah. I know a chatty clam like that, myself.

[ Klaus, he's calling you out. Although that particular not-sharing-important-information disease applies to quite a few of his siblings, come to think of it.

But now isn't the time for dragging his siblings. He's too curious about this group she's describing. ]

So a whole bunch of you, your past selves knew each other, and then you all met again? That can't be a coincidence, right?

They sure do!

[Kieran grins and runs over to one of the tables covered in horse supplies. He pulls out a handleless brush, plain, but sturdily built and holding together a decent clump of thick bristles. He returns just as quickly as he darted off, happily holding the brush out to Ben. There's a strap along the back to slide his hand underneath.]

[He keeps quiet otherwise, listening to his friend vent his feelings about the constant filming. It's hard to relate to that exact circumstance, the technology just isn't there yet (although he's seen Arthur running around camp plenty of times with that dang camera in his hands, catching gang members at inopportune moments left and right). He can, however, offer some objective insight on the matter.]

Sounds like yer the one who has the best excuse not to be alright with everythin' that's happenin'.

[Kieran busies himself with starting to slide a handmade bridle over Eavan's long face. It's still in its early stages of being built, with shoddy decoration covering its otherwise solid build. May as well get her used to the feeling of her new tack while she's in a safe area amongst friends.]

It ain't the best place to be stuck, but at least this, uh, station, ain't entirely like where you grew up. It's somethin' different. Different problems, sure, but still different.

Havin' all those cameras pop up all of a sudden is just a reminder of the hell you left behind. You don't need that. None of us do.

Edited 2019-10-19 01:11 (UTC)

Cole basks in the feelings, in the remembrance of fond family moments, of caring siblings and being something like a family instead of a team.

"Cole had a sister," he says softly.

He doesn't elaborate any further than that.

"I know mint. It grows through the forests and in the gardens of Skyhold." The smell fills the yard when people are trying to work through hangovers.

After a moment, he scrapes a tiny bit of the cherry and tastes it, jolting slightly. "It's even sweeter! Not like real cherries, sweeter!"

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